Exercise Caution …

Thursday, May 28th, 2020

With plenty of time on our hands, there are ample opportunities to consider love and to let your mind wander, imagining what might be. If you have been lucky enough to do any virtual dating during these difficult times, you might have fallen into the pitfall of thinking that the ‘relationship’ you may be having is ‘the one’ and that you are already head over heels in love.

That is not to invalidate the strong feelings you are having about the person you have been connecting with, but I caution you not to imbue this situation with expectations that are unrealistic and therefore unachievable. That is the road to failure. Conducting a relationship by text can present similar dangers.

People are, in reality, far more complex than they appear on screen, or via text. To help the relationship to grow once you have the freedom to meet up, you will need to recognise that the imperfections of others are integral to them and need acceptance. That ideal virtual version that may have captured your heart is not false, but is possibly one of the other person’s best versions of themselves. As they reveal themselves more fully in a real way, (which takes time), that person will become richer, multi layered and may turn out to be different in some ways to those you were expecting. It will be up to you to decide if any challenges you identify are ones you are willing to cope with. If it’s truly love, you will not judge!

The important message here is not to rush into anything when lockdown ends. Slow and steady sounds deadly boring doesn’t it? I can however promise you that it is THE best way to move forward in establishing your new relationship and will give you plenty of time to enjoy the process. The best things come to those who wait……

Karen X

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